somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Someone shattered a urinal.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
you never un-have a 4some
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Randomize
