I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Randomize
