I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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