the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
