What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Randomize
