I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
