I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
