im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Randomize