she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
