I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
