i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Randomize
