shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Randomize
