i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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