we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
