the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
