i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize