I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
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