someone owes me an orgasm
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
