My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
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