I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
My liver just had a heart attack.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Randomize
