I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
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