it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
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