Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
She's like a pop up book from hell.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
We left the knife in your bed.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Randomize
