remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
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