found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
