You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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