Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Randomize
