Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize