Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
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