i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
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