Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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