I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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