So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Found your dick twin last night
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Randomize
