Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize