So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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