She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
