Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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