bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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