i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
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