If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
We were destined to go to rehab together
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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