you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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