there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize
