Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
17 year olds will be the death of me.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
