She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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