If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
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