Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Can i not drive my cunt home
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
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