i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize