My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Randomize
