What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
