He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
