Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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